We've begun a new year and a new decade.
Many of us want to do more than mark time in the months to come.
It's traditional at the start of the year to make resolutions for change.
It's also traditional to be upset with ourselves when the changes we want to make don't stick.
Here's a tip backed by research: Start by watching what you're doing.
Whatever you've decided to change, don't do it, yet!
First, spend two weeks watching, noticing and recording the thing you want to shift.
Do it with pen and paper or a notes app.
What is the one thing you're looking to improve on?
Is it A) an urge to do something that's unproductive?
Is it B) a new way of behaving that you'd like to integrate into your life?
Step One for Goal A)
Notice the urge every time it happens and mark this information down right away.
1) What is the urge saying? How are you feeling? Angry, Sad, Bored, Nervous....?
2) On a scale of 1 to 10 how strong is the urge?
3) What time and place are you in when this urge hits?
4) After you indulge the urge how are you feeling? Happy, Guilty, Sad, Nervous...?
Step One for Goal B)
Take note of what you're already doing that is even a teensy bit close to the new behavior you'd like to acquire.
For example: Goal---"I want to go to the gym"
So, what are your already doing that is physically active even if it's not going to the gym:
Walking to the train? Cleaning the apartment? Using the stairs at the subway station?
Mark down what it is, how long you did it and how did you feel afterward.
So, the first change you're making is to look and see and record.
Once you have two weeks of information then you can know where you're starting from.
By the way, there's extensive clinical research indicating that simply tracking your behavior will begin to push you in the right direction.
Happy 2020 and Happy Lunar New York to all.
